It's just a question...

So, I've been spending a lot of time around Arabic speakers. There is a very high concentration of Saudi Arabian students studying here, and they come to dinner with us.

I've been asking a number of them a question that has been getting some interesting responses.

My question: In strict traditional Islam, women are required to cover (at least) their hair. This is because of the concern that the female body will incite a sexual reaction in men. So, I ask; why is it that men don't also have to cover up? Why is it that in many countries, the women wear long robes and scarves, but the men wear western dress? Why don't men cover up to avoid awakening a sexual response in women? (A couple of these Saudi guys are REALLY cute!)

The first Saudi man I asked told me that when he is in Saudi Arabia, he wears the full Thobe with head covering. He said that the Prophet covered himself more than the women did. He said that he personally only wears western dress here so that he will blend in and not get attacked as an Arab. He also explained that in his country, if a woman is raped, the men in her family will kill the offender without involving the police, so there is a certain responsibility on the part of the woman to do what she can to keep that from happening.

The second guy looked awfully uncomfortable and evaded the question. I found out later that he hates talking about religion. I probably shouldn't have asked him and might have gone about it differently if I'd known. (I'd been working under the assumption that the Saudi students were all about sharing Islam, since that's what a friend who spends a lot of time with them had told me. Apparently, this particular one wasn't one of them, unlike the first guy I'd asked.)

The third guy also seemed a bit uncomfortable, but explained that it had more to do with physical ability to rape. He said that since women are the ones who are vulnerable, they are the ones who need to be protected by the hijab.

The fourth guy also didn't know what to respond, but promised to ask a friend of his, who is more knowledgeable in such things and get back to me. I asked him a bit later if I had offended him, and he assured me that I could ask him anything I wanted and that if he didn't have an answer, he would find out. I made a point of telling him that he didn't have to answer my questions if he didn't want to. I haven't seen him since, but it's only been a day or so.

Every time I ask this question of someone, my friend (who was present for conversations 2, 3 and 4; and is Muslim to some degree, though even he is unsure at this point...really long story) berates me for asking this question. He asks me why I am not just satisfied with what the third guy said. Tonight, he asked me not to ask this question anymore in his presence.

It was this friend who told me that the Saudi students were interested in convincing people of Islam. I'd say that this is definitely true of the first guy I asked, not true of the second, perhaps true of the third and of the fourth. This same friend told me that the third and fourth guys are both very religious and that the fourth guy talks about Islam a lot. So, my thought is, that if (the rhetorical) you are going to want to convince me of your beliefs, then I want to know how this apparent double-standard is resolved. If you are going to ask me to believe, then I need to know what I am supposed to believe and why.

Also, I've asked more than one guy, because there is more than one version of Islam. Some schools of thought don't require any particular garments. Others require them to more or lesser degrees. I wanted to know what the belief is. From my experience, asking four Christians about what it takes to get to heaven will all potentially elicit very different responses, so I figured that it's probably the same with Muslims. I should note that the first guy I asked is very openly anti-Shia, so I suspect that this is indicative of such schisms.

I think that I should ask my Iraqi friend. Maybe he will answer. Actually...I might have already asked him once and I don't think that he had a clear answer, but I can always ask again in light of these conversations.